[Forum game] Corrupt a Wish

Ok, I'll start one here here's how to play:

1st person wishes: I wish I was a fish
2nd person says: granted but a shark eats you

I wish I had a hat

And it repeats. I'll start:

I wish my cat wouldn't be fat.

Granted, but now he's so thin he no longer exists.

I wish for a Key Lime pie.

granted, but you trip and you splat yourself in the face

I wish my cat came back, but was average-fat

Granted. But you're super-fat.

I wish I have beskar'gam.

granted, but it's made of plastic

I wish I had a sniper rifle to kill my cat

granted, but you kill yourself instead.

I wish I had magic.

granted, but all you can do is wave around sparkly dust

I wish I was alive again

Granted, but you're super ugly.

I wish I was superman.

granted, but you accidently fly into an incinerator.

I wish for nothing.

(and btw, it doesn't have to be about star wars. It can be anything you want!)

Granted, Bye!

I wish for a motorcycle.

granted, but it's handle bars are missing

I wish I wasn't bored

Granted. Now your board.

I wish for a suit of real Beskar'gam with all the hidden weapons.

Granted, But none of the weapons work.

I wish that I had a helmet with a HUD.

granted, but everything is in a completely alien language that you don't know.

I wish that I had a full set of beskar'gam that can't be corrupted

Granted, and It comes with an angry cat in the helmet tearing your face off.

I wish I had drawing skills.

granted, but your out of paper and you also gained the power to set anything you touch on fire.

I wish the rebels would be nuked.

Granted but all the rebels left on vacation and only their base was destroyed

I wish i had $1,000,000

Granted, but it's in paper money.

I wish I had George Lucas' head on a platter.

Granted but it eats your head and uses your body as its own

I wish i lived in the Star Wars galaxy

Granted, but it's a galaxy full of Jar-Jars and Anakins. *shudders*


I wish I was a real Mandalorian.

Granted. You're a New Mandalorian.

I wish I was a millionaire.

granted, but someone tripped over a chair in your mansion and sued you so now you're broke.

I wish my next wish will not be corrupted.

Granted, but its forgotten and never granted.

I wish for a wish above all wishes.

Granted but its so far above your head you can't reach it

I wish i had super speed

Granted, but you run so fast you change the direction of the Earth's spin, thereby freezing the planet.

I wish I had a Death Star.